the murtaugh list

Photo by Michael Dorausch it was about 1:12 am last night. we were on the way home from our very civilized wine celebration of bill’s 30th birthday, when i saw a guy get on the tram, start to hiccup wildly and then puke out the window. [tweetmeme]two thoughts occurred to me at that moment:

1. fuck’s sake prague.
2. i’m too old for this shit.

so, i decided with my 30th rapidly approaching and bill’s quite literally just passed, i should pay tribute to the murtaugh list. if you watch how i met your mother, you already know that this is a list of stuff you’re too old to do, inspired by sergeant roger murtaugh (aka danny glover in lethal weapon.)

observe (sorry about the poor quality, it’s all i could find):

the murtaugh list has gained a rather cultish following, and it even has its own social networking site. it’s a little bit like that oh-so-idealistic list of “things to do before i turn thirty” that we all made at the age of 17, only in perfect reverse. so, i will consider the following my ongoing murtaugh list, which can and will be updated whenever the time strikes. but for now, i’m too old to…

-puke out out the side of a moving vehicle, or be in close proximity to anyone who does.
-drink vodka and red bull, as pictured above.
-pull an all-nighter
-smoke socially
-combine oreos with red wine
-go clubbing
-get drunk and fall asleep on the floor of a vegas hotel room
-wear heels that tear up my feet, just to look good.
-make any kind of meal out of a box.
-go to any kind of gig that requires you to stand (or jump) all night
-attend a rock festival.
-drive 12 hours in one day.
-drink beer from a can.
-stay in hostel dorms.
-drink coffee at night.
-wake up with my hair smelling like secondhand smoke.
-sleep until midday
-travel by long-distance bus.
-skip breakfast
-smoke hash in a garage or dorm room.
-use a laundromat.
-see a band play more than once on the same tour.
-get snowed in on new year’s eve and have to split a cheap motel room with 5 other people.
-take the night bus/tram anywhere.
-eat anything from abrakebabra, especially after the sun has set.
-mix alcohols.
-go to a 10pm movie.
-fly ryanair.

this is not a complete list, and i will be updating it when the notion strikes me. but please, leave a comment below with some of your murtaugh list items!!

photo credit: michael dorausch, flickr creative commons

4 responses to “the murtaugh list”

  1. HA! I find this list entertaining because I have done a few of them recently – namely, drive 12 hours in one day, go to a gig that required me to stand all night (though U2 inner circle just may have been worth it… but NEVER AGAIN…), and travel by long distance bus (though I would venture that the MegaBus from Philly to NYC is nicer than the train… and has free WiFi!). Otherwise… I am totally with you on the majority of it!!


  2. with the invention of craft beer in a can, i might rescind that one.


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